Archives For Reviews by Rating


In No One Lives a young couple traveling across country run into trouble when they cross paths with a ruthless gang of killers who force them off the road and kidnap them. However, the gang soon realise that their latest victims are not what they seem.

Directed by Ryûhei Kitamura, who is known for making fast paced, over-the-top action-horrors which tend to be slightly trashy but fun to watch.

British actor Luke Evans is wonderfully dark and wicked in the lead role as the nameless driver. It’s fair to say the film owes its merits largely to his intriguing and captivating performance which dominates the first part of the film.

The motley crew of bad guys that make up the gang are where this film loses most of it’s points. The acting from the gang members is at best unintentionally hilarious, and at it’s worst, painfully forced and emotionless.
As all of Kitamura’s films, it moves forward quickly, which works well for the majority of the film. It doesn’t give you time to get bored or focus too much on it’s flaws. I felt it could have been slowed down a little in the mid section of the film to build up some suspense and tension, but that said, I don’t think most of the actors would have had the skill required to pull it off.

The overall production was solid. I liked the way the movie was shot, old school style angles and lighting techniques, it sort-of reminded me of Evil Dead, and I can’t fault the special effects.

It’s an odd movie. In places it feels like they had something…but they just didn’t do anything with it. I don’t think No One Lives will ever be anyones favorite horror movie, and in all likelihood it will quietly slip into the necropolis of long forgotten horror films.
However, if you find yourself still up at the early hours of the morning, and your brains in that surreal place where half of it is asleep but the other half is wired on junk food and take away, then this film might just be just the thing for you. I enjoyed No One Lives far more than I probably should have.


V/H/S 2

June 9, 2013 — Leave a comment

11171092_800Two investigators looking for a missing student break into a house and discover its strange contents of static video displays and piles VHS cassettes. VHS is back with a new collection of found footage shorts from a variety of up-and-coming directors.

This time around we have four shorts and a wrap around story called Tape 47. Let’s start with the wrap around. It continues using the same format (I’m not quite willing to call it a story) as the first VHS film. A questionable choice, as the format was weak to start with, offering very little in the way of structure and only loosely connecting each segment within the film. I can only think it’s been done to give some consistency between the two films. Tape 47 doesn’t really develop the narrative established in Tape 56, the wrap around from VHS, and much like the first is rather bland and unimaginative.

The first segment is called Clinical Trials, and is directed by (and staring) Adam Wingard. Hang on, we know that name right?  Yeah, this is the guy we have to blame for the Tape 56/wrap around story from original that has continued into VHS2.
Clinical trials revolves around a man who, following a car accident, is fitted with an artificial electronic eye. An unexpected side effect of the new eye is that the he starts to see ghosts in his apartment. What can I say about Clinical Trials? Well, it looks professional, at least as professional as a found-footage style film can look I suppose, and you do get to see some boobs…so it sorta has that going for it, but as you’ve probably guessed, I didn’t really like this segment. I found it a bit cliche; just another predictable and unoriginal ghost story. Not a great start to VHS2.

The second segment is a zombie film called A Ride in the Park, which is directed by modern ‘found footage’ architects Gregg Hale and Eduaro Sanchez, the team that arguably put found footage horror on the map with The Blair Witch Project in 1999.
This is where things turn around for VHS2. There isn’t much story to A Ride in the Park, but then, we all know the zombie story. What we do have is a gory, darkly comic and thoughtful zombie short that has a charming and surprisingly innovative feel for the tired zombie genre.

The third segment is called Safe Haven. Filmed in a documentary style, it follows a news crew as they investigate the practices of Indonesian cult. It is directed by Gareth Evans, who gave us the brilliant nonstop action thriller The Road, and Timo Tjahjanto. They have packed in a lot into this segment, it’s the only one that truly feels like a complete story, and even comes with traces of sub plots and superb character development, all of which culminates in an action packed ending. What stood out for me was the foreboding sense of doom and intensity felt throughout the segment.  A brilliant piece that could have easily been made into a full feature film.

The last segment, Slumber Party Alien Abduction (award for best title) is my favorite. The title pretty much explains the story, but it does little to sum up what you are about to experience. I sort of ended this segment like ‘what the hell did I just watch?’ but with a big smile on my face. This segment is crazy, in the best possible way. Directed by Jason Eisener, who is most well-known for directing modern grindhouse cult classic Hobo With A Shotgun. Although, don’t expect anything like that here. Slumber Party Alien Abduction is more like an 80s movie on steroids. Some of the edits and cuts are very disjointed, however, so much so that I suspect that this was deliberate, and adds to intentional chaos and rapid pace.

Overall, VHS2 has a bit of a feeble start, but stick with it. The last three segments might be some of the best found footage style filmmaking you’re likely to see for a while (VHS3?). A sequel far superior to it’s predecessor.

Segment ratings:

Tape 47: 3.0/10

Clinic Trials: 5.0/10

A Ride in the Park: 7.5/10

Safe Haven: 7.8/10

Slumber Party Alien Abduction 8.0

I’m not going to include Tape 47 for the overall score because I feel that it’s broken into such small parts that there is very little negative impact to the film as a whole package. If nothing else it serves as great time to get up and grab a drink or snacks between the segments.


Our Rating 7.0/10



Just a quick one today! friday,the,13th,horror,funny,interesting,surprising,fun-235750232f60806439018b2b8718fa5f_hI’m planning to actually start using the facebook page for my site. Horror movie news, updates, reviews, trailers, pictures and whatever other nonsense I find.

Here’s the link below, or just click to ‘F’ button 😀

Thanks guys!

Also, on another note, does anyone know where I might be able to get these? I really really want them! 😀



February 4, 2013 — Leave a comment

1-Mama-PosterTwo young sisters are abandoned in a shack deep in the woods with no way to fend for themselves. After five years later they are found, alive and well, explaining that their survival was down to a guardian they simply refer to as ‘Mama.’ The girls move in with their uncle and his partner in an attempt rehabilitate their development and restore some normality to their lives, However, it seems Mama isn’t quite ready to give up them up.

Mama is brought to us by Guillermo del Toro, the director of modern horror classics such as Pan’s Labyrinth and The Devil’s Backbone, but not as a director, or even producer, no Del Toro is the executive producer of Mama.  The title of executive producer has a somewhat ambiguous definition, it could mean having a direct input into the overall production of the movie, but it could just as well mean turning up on the last day to help pick out a nice cover poster. Now… I don’t know to what extent Del Toro was involved,  the sceptic in me suspects he may have been tagged onto this movie as a crafty marketing ploy.  Nevertheless, with his name all over it I expected fantastic visual experience. The first half meets these expectations, playing with the viewers imagination and fears of what might be lurking in the dark or moving in shadows, using a strange palette of  black and browns, accompanied by unsettling sound effects and clever lighting. However, in the third act the visuals take a sudden dive and start looking very glossy and fake. I can’t help but feel that this film would have benefited from more practical effects towards the end, where a few potentially scary scenes become more comical due to shoddy and careless CGI.

There has been some good attention to character development. First time director Andrés Muschietti clearly wants us to care for the characters in the story, and does a successful job of it too. This is helped by Jessica Chastain’s great performance as the female lead.

The story is a bit flaky and riddled with minor plot holes, although this can be largely overlooked as the first half of this film is wonderfully scary. The second half isn’t nearly as good, with the story escalating far too quickly and losing much of the built tension, and of course, the aforementioned plunge in quality of the effects. Still, the core idea of ‘there’s something in the house’ is done brilliantly. They stick to basic scare tactics, which ran the risk of being a very cliché, but they pull it off, producing some genuinely creepy moments.

Our Rating 6.2 / 10

American Mary

January 27, 2013 — Leave a comment

American Mary stars horror favorite Katherine Isobelle as Mary, a struggling medical student. As it becomes increasing difficult to manage her student debt. She soon discovers that her skills can be utilized to make big money in the underworld of body modification.

The film is written and directed by Canadian twin sisters Jen and Sylvia Soska. It’s refreshing to see women in the creative driving seat of a horror film, which is surprisingly still very uncommon.

American MaryAmerican Mary is a sleek and sexy film that is unpredictable and fairly unique. The story is dark, daring and entertaining, and solid production gives it clean and smooth look. It’s body modification theme is edgy yet tasteful, and at times quite thought provoking. Katherine Isobelle plays the lead brilliantly; cold and brutal, but at the same time, empowering and elegant.

As for Faults, well, American Mary is a great film, but it peaks two-thirds of the way in, and by comparison it’s ending feels a little timid and noncommittal.

Now, this is a bit over critical on my part, and it’s only a minor flaw, but one that stands out as there are so few in the film. It’s the cameo from the Soska sisters, I get it, I do, If I made a horror film, I’d want to be in it too, but this just wasn’t the parts for them. Although I suspect they probably wrote it with themselves in mind. It’s only a short scene but one with so much potential. The Soska sisters play big characters in a scene that could have been wonderfully unsettling, but instead its a bit flat and clumsy. The girls just didn’t have the physical presence or screen confidence required to fill out the roles.

American Mary would have been excellent if it wasn’t hindered by a few minor flaws and a weak ending. Overall, a delicate, but by no means tame, addition to the torture porn sub-genre. This film could easily become a horror cult classic, and deservingly so. I will be interested to see what the Soska sisters do next.

Our rating 6.9 / 10

Aloha, Mister Hand

This second part of my favorite scary movie moments series has sure taken a long time. As you know from previous posts, I’ve been very down lately. I’ve been trying to pick myself up though, and write when I can. Just because it isn’t published on here yet doesn’t mean I’m not writing anytime I get a dose of hitch in my giddy-up. I am. I might slowly but surely be coming back! As always, let me hear you! None of this means anything without you folks! This edition features a demon attached to a child, a psycho stalker with a knack for the telephone, a serial killer, and a vengeful British ghost. Hope you like the GIFS, but be gentle – it was my first time! 😉

Insidious (2011)

We all know that some people were bigger fans of Insidious than others. And while there were flaws in the…

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